Hard to Believe

Maybe I was wrong
Maybe I was right
Maybe it was anger
Maybe I was wrong
Maybe I was right
Maybe it was anger
Maybe it was.
Me

How could this
Have been different?
How could this be undone?
But it
Feels so insistent
I don't know
I don't know
I don't know
I don't know

The fights and the lies
The deceit I despise
Was it true
Was it you
I can't feel
Was it real?
How low can you sink
How sick of the stink
Your mind is a tar pit
And I get stuck in it

Used to be a king
Not a thing
Until I looked at my
Soul in a hole
And saw a life made of filth
And some guilt
And then I knew it was true
I have to thank you
Thank you

It's hard to believe
It's hard to believe
I'm still here
It's hard to believe
It's hard to believe
At all
It's hard to believe
It's hard to believe
I'm still here
It's hard to believe
It's hard to believe
At all

Should I swallow it all?
Pretend it was all a bad dream?
Or have I
Been so small
I missed
I missed
I missed
Something in between?

The fights and the lies
The deceit I despise
Was it true
Was it you
I can't feel
Was it real?
How low can you sink
How sick of the stink
Your mind is a tar pit
And I get stuck in it

Used to be a king
Not a thing
Until I looked at my
Soul in a hole
And saw a life made of filth
And some guilt
And then I knew it was true
I have to thank you
Thank you

It's hard to believe
It's hard to believe
I'm still here
It's hard to believe
It's hard to believe
At all
And it's hard to kill
It's hard to kill
This fear
Was I the only one
Who took the fall